FAITH IN ACTION

Mrs. Robin has been busy since my last visit.  She certainly has faith that this nest is going to be safe for her eggs.  Faith that she is going to even have eggs.  Faith that things are going to happen the way they are supposed to happen. 

Before I even made this visit, I today took a leap of faith of my own by dusting and storing away my beloved Christmas creche and lavender Christmas tree which have been in our TV area giving me solace and comfort; reminding me of the promise that all will be well.  I no longer need this crutch.  I am okay now.  The church is closing.  We have enough money to pay decent severence to our staff and to keep current with our bills until the final sevice which will take place on May 26.  It has been a long and stressful time.  I just could not bear to put away "Christmas" while I was deeply mourning this loss. 

I will still grieve.  Tears come easy, too easy.  The ache in my heart is forever.  And that's okay.  There will one day be new places to nest, new eggs to nurture, and new fledglings to support and encourage.  One day at a time.  This day is the day that it was NOT sad and heartbreaking to put away Christmas.  It is spring.  There is hope.  There is faith that all will be well.

HOPE

Mrs. Robin in going to try again.  Maybe it isn't the same Mrs. Robin.  Maybe it is.  The faith that it takes to start building this nest, four feet off the ground right next to our back stairs.... WOW!  Now, that is faith.  Some might call it instinct.  Perhaps faith is instinctive. 

If a mother robin can have that much faith, then surely I can have enough faith to know that the closing of Grace Church is not an end.  It can surely be the beginning of a new nesting in some other place.  In fact there will be multiple nesting places for the people who will be temporily without a church home. We will not all choose to go to the same new place.  We have different needs and different experiences.  What we have learned at Grace we will take with us and be changed yet again and change those with whom we join.

Maybe this is a good time for a church to be closing its doors.  It is spring.  There is that hopeful promise of all things new.  We have been enriched in this place.  We have learned more than we can ever pass on.  We have experienced resurrection and we will now follow Christ into the world to do what God would have us do.  We are equipped.  We are ready. 

APPREHENSION

Here it is April 13 and the Christmas Cactus is blooming.  How very odd as I have just today removed the Christmas table cloth and replaced it with the flowering one for summer.  The seasons are running into one another.  The world is topsy turvey.  It is confusing and unsettling.

Here it is April 13 and I am NOT looking forward to tomorrow's Vestry Meeting.  When finances are concerned, the emotions run hot.  When the church is closing and the money is running out the emotions are raw.  People are vulnerable and possibly not wanting to make hard decisions.  Hard decisions have to be made.  What do we do about staff severance?  Is there enough left to pay the current bills AND give severance to the staff?  On top of this there is a question of outreach requests.  Too much to grasp. The world is topsy turvey.  It is confusing and unsettling. And the meeting is tomorrow.  And we will have to make decisions.

Personalities clash.  Emotions may cloud judgement.  We will be hard put to be courteous and pastoral, to remain calm, to listen to one another.  We will have to count on God to be in the decision making.  We will have to count on God to guide us through the decision making.  We will have to count on God....

END-OF-LIFE HAPPENINGS





Who could not love this adorable little guy?  This is Gabriel, a twelve year old Shih Tzu.  Much loved by all who meet him.  A very significant part of this household.

Gabriel went to the vet today for a check up.  He is the same as he was three weeks ago when I took him in and learned about his end-of-life condition.  Oh, the end of life isn't tomorrow, or next week, or maybe even next year.  It is, however, an end of life stage.  He has nerve damage in his spine.  He does not control his back legs very well.  He walks with caution and often one or the other of his back legs gives way and causes him to collapse.

He does not seem to be in pain.  Some days walking is easier that other days.  We give him an anti-inflammatory.  He weighs 6.4 pounds today, up from the 6.2 of a few months ago.  He eats.  He drinks water.  He loves his treats after meds.  He sits on Bill's lap for long periods of time while Bill reads.  He sleeps curled up next to me at night.

The vet said that swimming in the bath tub might help him exercise his legs.  I'll have to figure that one out.  Also have to find a doggie life jacket for him.  She, the vet, also gave me the name of a pet rehab facility.  Didn't know such a thing existed.  I may look into that too depending upon how I manage the bath tub thing.

End-of-life phases happen to all of us.  Wonder how I will manage my own.  Or Bill's for that matter.  And who will be around to see to my meds and my rehab.  These things can happen at any time.  Best that we live each day fully and appreciatively.

Bill and I will do our best to love and care for Gabriel.  We will do our best to love and care for one another.