THE SLOG IS OVER

Not to mean that Lent is over, but that we are now into Holy Week. The liturgy of Palm Sunday has been laid to rest for yet another year. The palms are still green and flexible and beautiful. The music still echoes in our minds. The Passion has been read -- Matthew this year. I was privileged to read the 'Evangelist' part. I love reading this part because it is the glue that holds it all together. The whole of the congregation participates. We live the story of the betrayal and the condemnation and the crucifixion. But it is only a 'taste' of the story. As the week goes on we will participate more fully in the events that lead to the cross.

And isn't it odd that when I was at the halfway mark of Lent, I thought it would never end. Now I am feeling as though it has sneaked up on me and I am ill prepared. Did I do all those things I wanted to do? Have I been prayerful? What about repentance, self-denial, fasting, reading, meditating? How am I measuring up? And who is doing the measuring anyway.

This is one of the lessons that I have to learn. NO ONE is watching me. NO ONE is keeping score. No one probably even cares. Whatever it is, whatever choices I make, it is between me and God. And it is for that relationship with God that I strive.

FOLLOWING JOHN TO LAMBETH

... or Jeffri as the case may be. I finally succombed and downloaded the Reading Plan that has been issued for daily contemplation leading up to the meeting of Anglican/Episcopal Bishops who are to attend their once a decade meeting at Lambeth in June. It has been interesting reading Jeffri's interpretations. He has been reading the Daily Bible Commentary Edited by Richard A. Burridge so we have yet another interpretation.

Lambeth is a ways off in time as well as distance and if you are interested it isn't too late to join in the reading of John and commentary by Jeffri.

CHANGE

There is this saying that goes "The more things change, the more things stay the same." I want someone to tell me how that is. Like give me an example. I'm not getting it. Change for me is a major event. Even if it is a change that I am expecting or planning, it is still major. Causing unsettledness and discomfort -- usually, not always. And that may be okay, but it still is a disruption to the rhythm of my life.

Many changes I can 'take in stride.' Don't you love all these little sayings that we use to describe things for ourselves. Stride. Well to take it in stride means that the rhythm does NOT change. In order for that to happen, requires a great deal of concentration. Read self discipline. Maybe even preplanning. And even though the obvious stride does not change does not mean that the inner stride follows suit. In order to appear that the change is accepted may mean an internal upheaval. Which, of course, will eventually throw one off stride. Oh, dear.

I have survived any number of life changes. Too many to enumerate. Most of them pretty ordinary. Still in all some of them pretty major for me. More changes are coming, of course. That's life. What is worrisome, however, is how I will experience the changes, and how I will handle the changes. OR will the changes handle me?

Grace Church is going to change. What we look like and what we are is going to be way different than what I now know it to be. This gives me feelings of expectation and apprehension. I don't know what the changes will be. There is nothing to prepare me for the newness that is coming. The expectation is that it is necessary for our survival and it will be good. The apprehension is that I do not see myself in the new. Will this old self fit in to the new fabric of Grace Church?

LENT SLOGS ALONG

Half way. We are half way to Easter. I like that better that half way from Ash Wednesday. Genesis moves along. Joseph bails out his family. Jacob prepares to die. It occurs to me having leafed through the Ecclesiastes' readings for Wednesday's class, that we pay much to little attention to the other books in the Bible. We are such a Gospel oriented people, that Proverbs and Ecclesiastes were certainly eye openers for me.

Proverbs had quite a lot to say about living. Day to day living. What to do, what and whom to avoid. How to conduct oneself in society. Likewise Ecclesiastes but mostly in trite sayings rather than admonitions. Perhaps if we were to pay more attention to these books, the Gospels would not be so difficult to live out. Given Proverbs and Ecclesiastes, the Gospels should be a piece of cake. But they're not because we haven't been given the rules and regulations about how to live life. It is like we are thrust into the middle of it all and expected to get it right off. Only, of course, we don't. Because we don't have the tools. So much of our learning is the explanation and interpretation of the Gospels. Maybe if we had a better background it wouldn't be so hard.

BUT, we are where we are and we know what we know. So, make the best of it. Work harder at understanding and living the Gospel. For me, that means lighten up. Relax. Don't be so intense. Let God do most of the work. Accept. Have a sense of humor. God must do a LOT of laughing at our awkwardnesses with life, we may as well do some of the laughing with God.

WATER AWARENESS

Some years ago we were instructed to NOT run the water while brushing our teeth. I can't remember how that message got to us or when. I remember it was a hard lesson for me to learn. I don't remember whether I had to teach it to my children or if they were already there. Time folds back on itself when you get to be seventy. Anyway, we learned to brush our teeth without the running of water; using just enough to rinse off the toothbrush and then to rinse and spit. We must have saved a lot of water this way.

Now I soap my hands and rinse in cold water. I don't take baths. Quick showers. Well, not too quick but I don't stand under the water in contemplation either. The dishwasher is crammed to the edges before I run it. We have even started to save the shower water that runs before the water gets warm. I save the water that rinses out the coffee pot. Bill is not quite so fanatic and I frequently find myself admonishing him for wasting my great-grand children's water. He has become a little more careful.

For Book Club some time back we read "The Road" by Cormack McCarthy. It was a heart wrenching depiction of a father and son struggling to survive after what must have been an atomic cataclysm. Water was full of char and had to be filtered through ash soaked rags. This book made such an impression that I carry the worrisome images with me daily. It has made me even more conscious of my water usage.

Over on Lois' blog she has written a really neat piece about witnessing the natural activity of a beautiful hawk in her back yard while she was making tea. Water is a consideration here, of course.

When we do Bible study we frequently use the "African Method" wherein the scripture is read the first time through aloud to us and we are asked what phrase jumps out for us, and the second time for a particular word that strikes us. The third time is for what God is calling us to do but that doesn't matter in this discussion. When I listen to someone read I see the words. Maybe some black and white pictures, fuzzy gray , really -- stills. But when I READ the words I see the pictures like live TV, color, action. When I read about Lois' tea making, the only thing I could SEE was water going down the drain. I had to go back and reread the whole piece in order to really capture the delight of the hawk and the plight of the sparrow.

TOO MUCH TO READ

The book we are reading for the Book Club is "Straight Man" by Richard Russo. The review we read before making this choice said that it was humorous. Not humorous. I am thirty pages in and have not cracked a smile. In fact I have felt much pain and pathos for his characters. Even embarrassment for them. But I will plow ahead. 361 more pages to go by March 17th when next we meet.

At the same time Lois, our priest, has asked us to read the Book of Genesis. I did that in EFM several years ago. At great length with much discussion and theological reflection. Two years ago in Year Two of the Daily Reading for The Episcopal Church, I read the prescribed Genesis stories. Now we are in Year Two again and I am reading the stories again -- and hearing very different things than before. I may blog more about that. Needless to say, I am NOT going to read the whole of Genesis again. I am feeling that it is better read in parts and taking the time to refelct upon the stories. At least for me.

Saul Haffner, who is leading our Lent series on Wisdom Literature of the Hebrew Bible, gave us a syllabus and sort of encouraged us to read ahead for the next session. The Book of Proverbs. I am using Peterson's "The Message" to at least read the selected readings and perhaps I can even get into it and read some more. We'll see.

AND over on Jeffri's blog, he has begun the readings that are leading up to the Lambeth Conference. Readings from the Gospel of John. Go on over there for links, the reading list, and Jeffri's commentary. I don't have time. I will just catch his commentary as he puts it up.

BIG PROBLEMS IN PUPPYLAND

My dog is seven years old, weighs in at eight and a half pounds, and because my 'boys' are grown and out of the house, Gabriel is my delight. He generally sleeps in the crook of my bent legs during the night. He prefers that I walk him but has come to tolerate Bill holding the leash -- if he is desparate enough. I always prepare his food unless I am away visiting my sister. He is MY dog and I love him beyond reason. When he lost sight in one eye I opted to have a false eye implanted so that he would look the same. In fact it is hard to tell that he doesn't see with the false eye. If you didn't know, you wouldn't know. He is such a good dog that I take him out on the property (1/5 acre) without a leash. He stays right with me and follows simple commands: this way, wait, in, no. And so we have a relaxed walk around the yard.

Enter a big, bad dog. Next door. Next door with the neighbors that do not speak to us. Two days ago I had Gabriel out for a routine walk down the driveway and into the front yard. And then. AND THEN. Suddenly he turned and looked next door. And there in the driveway was a huge, HUGE, dark Lab. On a leash. But the human at the other end of the leash was struggling and being pulled forward. Gabriel is a friendly dog. He wants to play with everyone and so he charged right over to 'play.' The big, bad dog is straining at the leash, barking, snarling. Gabriel is right in front of him barking. Wagging his tail. Wanting to play. Fortunately, I was able to walk up behind Gabriel, scoop him up and take him into the house before the jaws of the lab closed over his tiny little head.

So now we walk him on his leash ALL the time. Even in the yard. Better safe than sorry. BUT, this afternoon when Bill took Gabriel out for a walk, the big, bad dog was pulling the next door teen ager on his sake board. Pell mell down the street and when the big bad dog saw Gabriel, he headed straight for him. The teen ager couldn't get off the board to stop the dog. Bill kneed the dog to fend him off, and finally the kid got off his board. A few choice words were exchanged. Harsh words from Bill. And the kid is laughing. Bill is furious.

I don't know how this is going to play out. It is really an awful situation.